But all good things must come to an end. On Wednesday we awoke in the hot darkness of the wee hours to load the bags into the waiting taxi, break down the travel crib and carry our two sleepy little boys out to their car seats for the two hour drive over bumpy, dusty roads to the airport. After a long but blessedly smooth day of travel, we returned home to frigid temps, one very happy cat and a driveway coated in a slick crust of ice. The next morning, just after I'd packed the children into the car for school, my mom-in-law phoned to say that she was heading back up to Vermont where her younger sister, Maggie lives.
Our beautiful Maggie. |
Maggie and her love enjoying the sun in Maine after her first stem cell transplant which led to a 6-year remission. |
Maggie and her friend, Helen, swimming out to the seals during her remission. |
Even during the many punishing rounds of chemo when her immune system had been zeroed out, she'd be out in her garden with her mask on digging in the dirt despite the fact that her doctors had expressly forbidden it. Having her hands in the earth made her feel alive and that's a pretty powerful medicine.
Maggie planting peas in her garden in the early spring. |
Below is her artist's statement for Gone To Seed - I find it very profound and moving.
In the late Fall of this year I hiked the familiar woods trails where every Spring for the past 30 years I have collected Vermont’s ephemeral flora. The transformation of the plants was so dramatic, from tiny shapes of starry pale flowers and their new born leaves clasped tightly around their stems to ungainly bug-eaten golden leaves bearing red and blue fruits, oozing their seed and juices into the soil and decaying leaf matter. What a metaphor for life, for my life, as I struggle with terminal cancer, birth, death and rebirth.
-Maggie Lake, December 2014
I did not get to see Maggie more than once or twice a year but we had a wonderful email correspondence. I felt that I could share pretty much anything with her - absurd or awful anecdotes from my daily life, stories about my kids - both funny and frustrating, recipes I liked, gardening questions, fears and insecurities I was struggling with, thoughts about art and life, etc., I will treasure her emails which were notoriously lacking in capitalization and full of the vivacious, appreciative, no-nonsense, humorous, generous, and loving spirit that marked her life. It gives me a queer, hollow feeling in my gut to know that there won't be any new ones arriving in my inbox.
Below are a few bits from messages she wrote me while wrestling with terrible physical pain and the tremendous uncertainty of not knowing how soon her life would end.
"i still love life and the big fat golden quinces out the window begging to made into membrillo. delicious with goat cheese on a good cracker. better go pick em."
"i think the world of beautiful things is the answer to all problems; loving your kids, your partner, your friends and family. loving the growth of gardens and plants and the miracle of seasons. sharpening your awareness of the wind, sun on your face, the feel of dirt when you pull weeds, the beautiful smallness of life. i will so miss it. i love you m"
"i am getting into the tub. bath, bed and beyond. love you m"
Here's to you, sweet Magpie, wherever you are. I hope you have found the most wonderful peace.
13 comments:
This is very beautiful Eve. I am sorry for your loss. This post made me want to live more fully, and the one quote at the end flooded me with emotion. Thank you for your honest and loving sharing. ~Danielle
I have thought of Maggie often since reading the post about the lentil salad. What an amazing woman and what a profound loss for you and your family.
You are blessed with wonderful memories and Maggie's wisdom.
Take care.
What a lovely person to have had in your life. So sorry for your loss.
This is a Beautiful tribute, she's in a wonderful peaceful place.
Eve, this is such a beautifully written, moving tribute. I'm so happy you had someone like Maggie in your life, and I'm so, so sorry you no longer will. You, your husband, and the rest of your family are in my thoughts. Sending many hugs your way.
What a loving tribute, your love is so clear and present. As I sit in hospice with my mom I'm understand the joy of the little moments that make up the memories of the ones who have left this life. Thank you for sharing and warm thoughts to you and your family.
Thanks, Kristen. I did not realize your mom was sick. Sending love.
Hi Eve- Thank you for this wonderful tribute to Maggie. I had the great pleasure to work for and with Maggie in her art studio for a few years. She taught me so much, about so much.
- Michele
Thank you for that, Eve.
She was a wonderful artist and a terrific Nurse Practitioner! Such a loss here in Westminster West.
Maggie was our health practitioner and was such a joyful person. My daughter a, as a toddler, referred to her as maggielake, all one word, and was always eager to go and see her at the office in Putney. Even shots were okay when given by maggielake. She will be missed but will always be woven into the fabric of our family!
Just wanted to say how nice it is to hear from those of you who knew and loved our Maggie from various aspects of her life. And it's nice to hear from those of you who didn't know her, too :)
Remember only the physical body is out sight.. that spirit is still with you that cannot fade. The universe keep our secret,and beyond we form from the unknown to human then when leave we become that special gift. Memory.
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